Succesful concert! >:D .. and little musings//

Woot! It was tiring today, just came home from a concert in Harajuku. People were great! I just love concerts! The hype, the energy, that crowd!! Man!! It feels better than sex!! It's love, music and magic.. Just WOW!! I love concerts.. I feel like all my hard work has paid off.. I love seeing people's happy faces, and I love hearing the shouts of joy of the audience... making people happy always make me feels good.. so fluffy and mushy inside. <3

I find happiness in other people's happiness, maybe because I don't have any happiness of my own.. maybe I love concerts because when I'm in front of the crowd, singing on the stage with my band mates, I never feel alone... maybe because when I sing and pour my heart out, I feel that I sympathize with me and share my pain and loneliness.. or maybe I just want them to feel all the pain and suffering that I feel--

Enough of the drama! ^///^
HAHAHA. I hate drama. But, well, my life's a big drama itself. Feels weird. I feel like I'm living in some sort of prime time show. But I guess I owe it all to my dramatic life that I am what I am right now.

You see, even though I live in Tokyo, I was born a and raised in Kyoto. Spent half of my life there. Then I moved here to find a job, didn't go to college. Who needs college anyway? Tsk, tsk. And even though I did want to go to college, I couldn't. It was too expensive for my beloved gramps.. and gramps was too old to work. I didn't want to be a burden to him.

If you're wondering where my parents are... well, I don't know. Gramps said that one day, when he was going off to play music for a teahouse (Gramps was a famous musician in Gion), he was surprised to see a cute little baby in his doorstep. That cute little baby was well, no one else but me. ^w^U

I grew up with gramps.. he raised me up. :P Gramps is the coolest gramps there is..
He liked to play the shamisen when I couldn't sleep, and tell me tales of the Yamata no Orochi when I got bored.. he loved making stories up too.. about yurei and kappa and Yuki-onna... I loved being with gramps, I never ever got bored. He taught me to play the shamisen and koto, too... and even though he tried to teach me to, I could never make music with a leaf like he could. Hahaha... >w< Gramps had no family left. His wife and children died in an accident, and he was the only one who survived, leaving a a scar on his right eye.

My mother? I don't know where she is or who she is. But my father...

Life should have turned out great with Gramps, but one day, a letter from a man claiming to be my father arrived. The man who wrote the letter said that if I agree to manage his company, he'll pay for all my expenses and even send me to a private school in the U.S. I wrote back to him asking if I could bring Gramps along with me to America, but his reply was that he didn't care about my Gramps, that Gramps can be moved into a home for the aged if I wanted to. Then I said 'WHAT?! No way!!' Hey, I loved gramps! More than anyone else! He raised me up even though he always said that I was a hard headed numb skull, Gramps never gave me up to anyone. Even though I saw that he had a hard time paying for my tuition in grade school and high school, he never gave me up. Well, after what I wrote back to Mr. Nobuo (that was the name written on the envelope, Nobuo Shuuchi), he never replied back. Only then did Gramps tell me that this Nobuo Shuuchi was a rich business man, and his line of business were five star hotels and restaurants. He even told me that I was a stupid kid to not accept an offer like that... Gramps said that I should leave him alone in his old house because he was also old and useless.. My eyes widened because of what he said, but I just smiled and hugged gramps. I told him that I would never ever exchange him for anything or anyone, like he did to me. He chuckled and hid my head with rolled up news paper. "Stupid boy." He said.

Well, after a couple of months, I moved to Tokyo and played the guitar (I'm self taught. :)) in bars and small gigs. And I met Jin, Yuki, Kyouhei and Ran in a bar.. we decided to form a band together (with me as lead singer, lalala), and luckily, we got discovered by BLAST Productions. Now, we're known as SuKeBo, Japan's most famous J-rock band. HA HA HA HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHHAHAAAAA!! What happened to gramps? Well, he owns a small ramen shop in Kyoto (I got it builty for him:)). He says it's okay if I leave him there, that he's happy and he's got Minky to keep him company. (Minky is my three colored cat. I picked him up on the street on the way home from school) Half I earn is for Gramps' ramen shop.. and for the maintenance of our little house and his instruments. Half is for myself of course, because well, I need food too, ya know. XD

Here in Tokyo, I live a glamorous life. I get what I want in the snap of my fingers. I get the latest trends with out having to pay for anything... When I dress up, teenagers copy my style and I appear in every magazine you can think of! >:D Here in Tokyo, beneath the bright lights and flashing cameras, there's only Kei, the lead singer of SuKeBo, who's dashing, sexy and bold. The Kei who is known to everybody as "The Beautiful Prince of J-rock"... The Kei who will always make girls faint because of his heart shattering charm...

..but the boy named Nobuo Kisuke, who spent twenty three years of his life loathing himself for all his failures, for all the things he couldn't do for himself and for the people who love him, who always feels so empty because he doesn't know himself... the boy who cries himself to sleep at night, the boy who always picks up lost kittens on his way home from work, who's afraid of the dark and closed spaces.. Nobuo Kisuke, who will always be the frightened little boy who Kei tries to hide.. the boy who will always be unknown to everyone for the rest of his life... everyone, except to Gramps.